A Little Help From My Friends!

Posted: March 26, 2014 in Tiffany
Tags: , , ,

I’m on a bloody roll tonight! So I decided to ask my lifelong friends about their views on the sex industry and how these may have changed since I became a part of it. I asked five of them and only one of the came back to me, the bloody bastards! Although, two of them have kids, one’s just had another, and the other is a workaholic! So thank you very much to my lovely friend who did reply, and I’m glad it was her as her responses are quite funny as well as being interesting to read!
The first question I asked was “What were your opinions/thoughts on the sex industry before I told you I had started working in it?”
Her answer was this…

The sex industry, in my opinion was always a bit of a naughty taboo that I was intrigued by but would be embarrassed to tell any partner, even friends without a few glasses of wine under my belt.
The girls… Yes, I admit, I perceived them as needy, attention seeking slut bags who were probably only in the industry because they could not get a ‘proper’ job. Was I a tad jealous of their sexual confidence and body confidence? For the most part yes, yes I was.

Pretty standard response there – one I held myself for many years! Desperately curious, but taught to shun and look down my nose at it. Typical!
I then asked her if these opinions had changed since I became a “needy slut-bag” haha!

Definitely! Where I still think there are a small majority of needy slut bags, on the whole I have learned people in the industry just love sex and have made a career doing what they love. Is this not what everyone would like to do? As long as the performers are consenting adults then it’s not an issue.

Funnily enough, she wasn’t all that surprised when I started my foray into the world of adult misadventure!

Shock, surprise, utter disbelief? Not in the slightest….
Not because I perceived you as said slut bag, but because you’ve always expressed an interest in this area, you are sexually open minded and enjoy ‘trying new things’ and you’re good at it! Why wouldn’t you turn it into a way to make a living?
I did however have my concerns, mostly about safety. But after much reassurance I realised if things are done in a safe controlled environment then it’s not to different to any other job. You go there, you perform to the best of your ability (for the lost part) then go home.
Another concern, what will people think? Would you be recognised, would people be horrible to you etc etc. Yes some where, some friends didn’t agree with this new lifestyle choice, but on the whole most were intrigued and excited about our old friends new job. The stories we heard…. 😉

Ah, gee thanks, so glad you don’t think I’m a slut-bag, pal! HA!
Do you think people automatically have negative views of the sex industry, then?

Yes, I certainly did. On the whole it’s seen as being a bit seedy, maybe dirty? (In most senses of the word) but after hearing your experience, I have learned most in the industry are functioning members of society, this for them is a profession, some a hobby but maybe for a tiny percentage a necessity to fulfill their financial and maybe emotional needs.

I wish I could pinpoint where this automatic conditioning against sex, sexuality and sex work comes from!? But I think it is so deep-rooted in society that we don’t even notice until the opportunity arises to challenge and question it?!
So then I went all mainstream and political and asked my bestie what she thought about all the crap in the media about censorship and the banning of porn and prostitution. A deep and compelling subject, between two friends who think farts and toilet humour is hilarious.

I think if it was banned people will still find a way and as with anything this will create a much more dangerous environment where things will not be as controlled and the performers will not be treated as well as they are within most legitimate work places. I do not think watching porn makes you some depraved sex addict who rapes, attacks, abuses another person as much as I don’t think watching a horror film will make you want to go on a murderous rampage.

So, any final words to our lovely readers then love?!

In my humble opinion, as long as you are not hurting yourself or others either physically, mentally or otherwise it is utterly your prerogative to do what you like, with whoever you like, however you like! What’s the difference between being paid to perform sexually, and going out on a Saturday night and having sex with a stranger and leaving the next morning with nothing more than a raging hangover and the taxi fare home? About £200 quid (depending on the performance)!
The difference being the latter is more sociably acceptable. Most people have done it so it’s ok. The porn industry has been much more featured in the media lately showing the ‘normal’ side to people in the industry and I think this has been in the main a positive thing for the industry and it’s employees.

So there you go. That’s what my best friend thinks about my career choice! If the others ever get back to me, I’ll let you know! Until then, catch up on all my other posts, and keep an eye out for the next lot – which comes from the service users!!!

  1. bigd1957 says:

    Very thoughtful and insightful. I think most of the prejudice comes from the silly male superiority complex, something that I as a man have never really understood. Sexually confident women are seen as a threat by many men, and of course that would apply to any woman who would willingly work in the adult entertainment industry. I am still of the opinion that adult entertainers make a significant contribution to the overall well being of society.


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